Revised plot discourse

Original plot discourse post - http://oliviashearinga2media.blogspot.co.uk/2012/10/plot-discourse.html

This is a revised plot discourse after filming my footage.

Shot 2 (without the zoom) is now the opening shot. The reason for this change is that I couldn't get the camera to focus on the subject of my original first shot and the zoom wasn't smooth enough.

Shot 3 has now been cut due to it not being relevant. This shot will now be replaced by a shot of the girl's hands (originally shot 11), followed by a fade to black.

Shots 5-8 need to be revised. I wasn't able to film the specific shots I originally wanted, however I did film some footage which could be used in place of the original shots. If the footage is appropriate, it will still be in sepia.

Shot 9 has been cut. Instead I will go straight to shot 10. I may use the shot of the girl's hands again if I feel it is necessary.

Shot 14 has been adapted slightly. The dialogue remains the same however the extreme close up has now been changed to a mid-shot showing the whole of the girl's face instead of focusing on one aspect. This was due to reasons similar to that behind the changing of shot 2.

Shot 15 has been cut.

Shot 17 has been changed slightly. Originally there was going to be muffled dialogue, however due to my changed narrative I will now have the following (characters unseen):

SUSIE - "Mum I'm hungry!"

MUM - "Susie I've only just got in from work alright! Just give me a minute."

SUSIE - "But I'm hungry now!"

MUM - screaming

Shots 18 and 19 have been cut. Instead I will use footage that was improvised on the day. This will include 'Susie' picking up the camera and filming her surroundings and showing the bodies of 'Mark' and her Mum.

Upon reflection, I may intercept the credits throughout this shot. This will ultimately depend on overall timing and the length of the footage.

I am thinking of having some music feature at various points in my film as the majority of it is without dialogue or specific background noise. I plan to ultimately make this decision when I have revised my footage and decided on the atmosphere I want to convey throughout my film as I feel this may have changed quite drastically after the filming of my footage.